An unaccepted journey
by TheRockerOfTheOutlaws
Summary: Another adventure beings but this time it involves a company of dwarves, a hobbit, a wizard and his apprentice. Once a lone ranger she accepted Gandalf's offer but little did she know that this adventure would bring out secretes and hidden feelings.
1. Chapter 1

The night was new. The air was fresh. The sky was clear and the moon shined bright, showing who the rightful leader of the sky was at night. The trees were old, they could tell their own story of Middle Earth, plants entangled themselves with each other, swapping their tales, like the men in the tavern while drinking their ale, some would swear it was true words and the rest would just roll their eyes knowing better. Moss grew, not knowing what personal space was, but trees had no choice to be friends. Might they be old, but they were strong, their trunks like armours fighting the weather, their roots firmly underground making them sturdy. It was all quiet except the noise of the crickets. All was normal but within the peace, there was an unexpected journey to be had, unexpected guests to strangely be welcomed to a hobbit hole, an unexpected tale to be told and an unexpected truth lay ahead, waiting to be told and have their own fate.

Bo stood within the shadows of the trees, her dark eyes upon The Shire, not seeing anything of importance. Questions filled her but she knew Gandalf too well not to ambush him with questions. He was an important wizard, everyone knew that, but these were dangerous times, you needed to learn who you can and cannot trust. If any important news were told to the wrong person then war would be here faster than they hoped. War. Something Bo knew all too much about. War surrounded nearly every single creature, it surrounded the history of Middle Earth, making creatures stay within their packs and make them have a hard time to trust. But staring down at The Shire, Bo sensed peace and freedom. If she knew too well, she would have relaxed but she had been around Gandalf for too long to know there was always danger around.

Hobbits. Bo recalled Gandalf briefly explain the nature of these creatures, they were peaceful. They loved their food, their comfort, the quiet, everything they loved and had are within the Shire, and they were no creatures of adventure. The Shire was something of a place. Which Bo loved, but she weren't no Hobbit, she couldn't sit still for longer than five minutes, a lot of things were on her mind, her heart weren't light and she had a past which she wouldn't tell, but left a massive burden on those she called friends. As she stared, she wondered if the creatures called Hobbits knew about the world outside the beauty, or if they knew about the real dangers and monsters which lured around these parts and near the north.

Guessing the answer, Bo raised her gaze to stare at the moon,and realized a heavy sigh. Time was growing short, numbered days laid ahead of them and she felt restless until she knew what was happening. She knew something big was planned, but what the big thing was, she didn't know. Gandalf was quiet on the subject when Bo bravely asked him or where he had been. She was his apprentice just short of three years ago, she was alone, she roamed around Middle Earth on her own errands, people told her it was too dangerous to do such things but they knew nothing of her l, nor would they ever know. She hoped.

Walking towards The Shire, Bo stared at Gandalf, her questions burning inside her, she hoped he would answer them soon, he had been keeping her in the shadows for too long. She knew about the Company of Dwarves, she could smell their stale air on his cloak and saw his eyes full of questions, showing his thoughts of what laid ahead and masking his feelings of what he heard.

She quickly turned her gaze to stare before her as Gandalf glanced to stare at her. She weren't scared of him, she weren't scared of anyone but Gandalf with along with many people, she knew where her place was and not to mess with them. Magic was a dangerous weapon, one of the most powerful weapons she came across, the most powerful weapon ever told of in folk stories.

Feeling Gandalf's gaze turn, she stared back at him. He was tall, his clothes and staff showed off his status and his power. He may look old but he was Gandalf the Grey, one of the greatest wizards there was. She only knew three out of five. Sauraman, he was the greatest of them all, but someone Bo didn't like (if she was honest she was scared of him), then there was Ragadast the brown, Bo liked the wizard, he was strange but that didn't matter, he was caring and preferred the company of animals than of those who stand on two legs (something which she could relate to) and then there was Gandalf, well there was a story to tell there, just something which involved her in a fight and nearly being killed. But Gandalf saved her and he wanted her to be his apprentice. She considered to be in his debt so here she was.

"There's something on your mind Bo." She heard Gandalf say bringing her out of her thoughts. "You have questions which you have wish to ask me for a while now, why haven't you ask them? I've been here only for a few days, nothing to disturb us. You've been awake with these questions, I heard you walk away from camp many times these past nights. So prey tell me, these questions which you wish to ask me."

Bo stared at him, she was used to his ways but that didn't stop her from being dazed. She shook her head clearing her mind. "If you knew all that, you probably know my burning questions."

"Then you are misunderstood."

"Why are we going to The Shire? Why are the Dwarves coming with us? What is up ahead? What is going on?"

Silence was what Bo got for a few seconds, she noticed the air tensing. When Gandalf finally responded, his voice was clear but Bo noticed the gruffness which laced his words. "Some things I cannot tell you Bo, these things are too important to speak of so freely. It seems these are dangerous times, there is creatures which need our help on matters which are too great to scale. I'm sorry for being short but when everyone is all together then you will understand."

Bo stopped as Gandalf finished. With a disappointed glance she watched the old wizard walk away. She was in hope that he was going to give her the answers but her hope was left to deflate like a balloon. Letting out a sigh, she kicked the dirt upon the ground and went back to following him. She hated it when he did that, to make her feel like she was finally being listened too, but then quickly put her down. She should have been used too it but she had been accustomed to her own company and only thinking of herself. At times she fell back in her old ways, but if anyone proposed a threat to her or Gandalf or anyone she called friends, then she would defend them as well as she could. Her inner self showing.

Walking she felt the free Shire air being claimed by the air they brought with them, the lands which are foreign to the Hobbit folk, the one which they only heard in their songs and tales but would frown upon setting foot in such places. Bo was glad it was nightfall, she imagined the Hobbit folks expressions if they saw her, she was used of the strange, picky eyes and the odd word here and there but it still made her feel uncomfortable. If on her own she would have forgotten about other folk's laws and accustoms and would challenge anyone who stopped her but with Gandalf she had to behave herself and keep out of the way. Many things she had to learn and grow accustomed to but it took her a shorter amount of time than she had thought.


	2. Chapter 2

All was peaceful in the Shire, except for the whispers from the small group of dwarves which joined Gandalf and Bo, they seemed excited but Bo could sense nerves among them- were they scared of her? Bo was used to that behaviour, not many folks had seen anything quite like her; only a few know the truth and those of her kind were non-existent. You can say she was one of a kind, but depending how she took the comment, it would probably get you killed.

Bo ignored the dwarves and followed Gandalf, she was still annoyed that he didn't answer her questions. She thought she had been patient, yet being patient paid no price no what did was bravery, skills, knowledge and weapons. That she believed in and stuck by, yet Gandalf tried to persuade her to make aliases with different folk many times, despite her little effort, they didn't want to know her or were scared of her.

Bo stood at a hobbit hole door behind a small group of dwarves, she stood away letting them fall onto the ground when the door was finally opened. She felt a smile form on her face but it didn't grow any wider as she felt Gandalf's gaze upon her, instead rolled her eyes. Hearing the unexpected host's realisation of who it was and who's idea to bring the dwarves to the Hobbit Hole, Bo stared at the Hobbit and wondered why Gandalf had in plan and if it involved the little fellow.

Quickly she followed the old wizard in the warm hole and let her eyes wander her surroundings. She had not seen anything quite like it. Everything looked quite grand! Though small, the Hobbit Hole didn't show its size, it showed features of family pass downs, warmth, love and cleanliness. Awe showed in her big eyes, however hearing movement she brought her attention back to the matter whose presence she was in. She turned her head and notice the company of dwarves had forgot their fixation of Bo and their minds turned to food, she watched with shock as they all took over the house, some were putting food on the table, ordering the chairs to fit them all in, some carried food on plates around, those walking and carrying tried not to walk into each other. Bo smiled watching Bilbo trying his hardest to retrieve food back and telling the unwanted guests to put the food back. She felt sorry for the Hobbit, as she wouldn't like unwanted guests to barge through her home and eat all her food! Yet she didn't have a place to call a home. The wild was her home. The grass of Middle Earth, the trees, the air and the water; that was her home, not strong walls, not warmth from fires in the fireplace or the comfort of safety.

"Bo, is everything ok?" She heard Gandalf ask gently.

Bo glanced sideward to see he was standing next to her. She saw his concern but she sensed there was something else, another thing he kept away from her. Maybe two could play the same game? Maybe she could pretend nothing was bothering her and see how long he could act like he didn't care. Bo looked back at the scene before her and knew her plan wouldn't last long. Gandalf knew everything. Whatever happens in Middle Earth doesn't pass the wandering wizard. She smiled as the thought of Middle Earth being renamed after Gandalf and him hearing everyone's truth and lies while he sits smoking his pipe.

"I haven't seen so many dwarves in one place before. They really do love their food" Bo stated. "I've seen a pack of Wargs demolish their hunt!"

"You better help and get some food before they all have it." Gandalf said before walking away.

She stared at the wandering wizard and thought his words were true. She quickly walked to the kitchen and couldn't believe what she was seeing, six dwarves grabbing what they can, mess everywhere and no space to move! Bo just stared at the scene for a few seconds before her eyes caught a three wheels of cheese. She glanced to the dwarves and saw they were too busy collecting other food. She licked her lips before pushing herself to the cheese. However as she stretched her hands to pick up one wheel, another pair of hands grabbed not just one but three and walked away; leaving her with confusion and anger. Rude was the only word that came to mind as she watched the dwarf who she learnt was called Bombur walk away.

Bo glanced around to see if there was any other food and her eyes caught a plate of ham! She rushed over but to be pushed out the way by another dwarf. She narrowed her eyes as she watched him walked away. She let out a sigh and gave up. She walked out and stood next to Gandalf and watched solemnly as the dwarfs took charge of the food.

"Fili, Kili, Oin, Gloin, Dwalin, Balin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Dori, Nori, Ori" She heard Gandalf say, she watched as he counted on his fingers while he named each dwarf. Twelve dwarves!

"You better warn them Gandalf, if they get in the way of me and my food, they have a price to pay." Bo said angrily. "And it won't be a nice one either."

"Come on Bo, they've travelled far and wide for many days." Gandalf said gently so only she could hear. "You've been there yourself, days without food or water, and the hunger grows to the amount that you dream about the food that you crave."

Bo rolled her eyes and knew he was right, but she still didn't like being pushed around. She watched Gandalf stroll away to the dining room to settle himself at the table, she noticed how tall he was compared to the company of dwarves, he looked out of place, and to be honest they all seemed to be out of place in the hobbit's home. They all didn't belong there or the Shire at that matter, their tales would be known through songs and folk stories but none would know the truth or the real details, Bo had heard many tales about Gandalf, some had turned out to be true but she learnt his version to be more interesting and realistic than a drunken man telling the whole pub the things he had heard one night.

"Oh how things change in a matter of seconds." Bo found herself saying to herself before sitting down next to Gandalf. Sitting down she felt uncomfortable, she hadn't sat around a table with many people before, she watched a few seconds the scene of dwarves grabbing food and shoving it in their mouths and drowning their ale! Learning from her mistakes from earlier, Bo quickly grabbed anything she could and put it down on her plate.

Sensing someone's eyes on her, she looked up to see it was Gandalf's. "What? I'm hungry too." She said before grabbing the plate from him and taking a roll herself before passing it along.

Chewing on the piece of roll, Bo looked up hearing Bofur say: "Bomfur catch!" and watched as the one at the end caught the food in his mouth and heard everyone cheer. They were behaving like children! Bo just watched knowing she had to watch her tongue, she knew they were small and acted like this sometimes but if offended they held their grudges for a life time!

She found herself joining in with their drinking games and food fights! She finally felt at ease for the first time since she could remember, looking around she knew they weren't as different as she thought. They had lost their homes. Lost contact with people they once knew and loved. Their lives were so fine and care free but now turned upside down, to be forced to live somewhere which they were made to call home, have many enemies and grew cold; trusting no one.

"Who want's ale?" She heard Fili ask bringing her out of her thoughts.

She watched as the young dwarf walked along the table, kicking food out of his way. She caught some and ate it thinking it be would be a waste if it was left alone. The food she caught and cooked on the camp fire was good and sometimes filling depending on the source but the hobbit's was outstanding! She hadn't seen so much food for years. She wished she could take it with her but it would waste time and space in bags. She realised while finishing off a chicken leg that she hadn't had a proper meal for six months, since they left Prancing Pony. Thinking of the inn, Bo lowered her gaze, her heart sunk in its cage; sinking slowly in its pool of guilt which waited below. She had said too many goodbyes, to both places which she knew and dreamt of and people she once knew, names she recalled but no faces appeared as they've all changed or not around no longer. That was one reason Bo was against Gandalf's idea of making allies, because she was scared to say hello then to shortly say goodbye again and make a broken promise, she knew how that felt like, it still followed her through her life and she didn't want other people to feel like that. The other reason was because she didn't trust anyone no more. Her trust was taken and never grew back, like dead grass...

Bo quickly looked up hearing Ori burp and the others laughed at his triumph! She gave a ghost of a smile but her appotiate was lost and so was her world. Feeling her anger build within and tears form in her eyes, she stood up and rushed off, she could feel many eyes on her but she didn't want them to see the weak side of her. Not now. Not ever.

Standing outside, she let out a heavy sigh. She felt her chest tighten every breath she took. She was wearing dark, unflattening clothes: breeches and a simple shirt, black light boots and a dark cloak with a paw pin locked within the material so it wouldn't fall off.

Staring at the moon, her tears were visible in her black eyes, the question of how long she could keep hiding was becoming impossible. Hiding her emotions was getting harder, at times she wanted to run away where she could be free to scream, cry and shout but the only place was in her mind. Lies she had to keep up with, at the beginning she found it hard but now it was second nature, as she grew used to the harsh wild life of Middle Earth, she had grown use of lieing to people and keeping herself to herself; burdening herself with the past and unwanted feelings.

Tearing her gaze away from the moon, Bo stared ahead and saw the small village of Hobbington. It looked so beautiful at night, the moon being the main source of light but there were lamps lighting the homes of the small, quiet creatures, making the place look innocent and precious. It was what Hobbits called home. Not dwarves. Nor elves and certainly not Bo. Home is where the heart lies. Is what the saying goes, but Bo didn't know where her heart laid. She was stuck in the past, seeing the world through her child's eyes, seeing every creature as equal, her home full of love, warmth and comfort and no thoughts of a nightmare that came like a hurricane; ruining not just her life but a whole species!

A specie full of evil and hatred, nothing more and nothing less. Creatures which hate the world and they turned their back on everyone, only to kill and seek revenge they set their eyes upon the world again; to make others' lives hell. Blood marked their hands, never to leave their skin like their killings never leave their victim's loved ones as they had watched the horror or heard the news and knowing they weren't going to come back.

Bo was talking about orcs. She had more hate for them than anyone! She seeked for revenge for her family and friends. She had lost so many at a young age. Her world was turned upside down within seconds! The tragic event burned in her mind, making her wake up in the middle of the night in cold sweat as she saw her mother's face before turning to leave and never to return, the empty promise to a loved one of 'everything is going to be ok and I'll be back when things are calm.' A sentence full of empty simple words, ones Bo couldn't erase nor the screams and yells of her people as the orcs demolish them, except for one. Except for Bo.

"Bo..." Gandalf called, his voice soft knowing he had to be careful.

Bo stayed where she was. Lost in thought. Tears ran down her cheeks as the memory of her people erupted before her. All was gained to be lost. Nature took their homeland after years of the battle, covering up the ruins of houses, decaying bodies but nothing could get rid of that event. Fire surrounded the site, along with smoke the sky was full of terror and prayers which were not heard by the gods. Swords clashing against each other shot through the deafening noise. Growls of hungry orcs and their wargs, ready to fight and dig in, to fill themselves with blood and food! Hell was it was but a living nightmare which stayed with Bo...

"Bo?" Gandalf said again as he stood next to his apprentice. Seeing the young woman's eyes lower he let out a sigh knowing what just happened. "How long have you been having these...thoughts?"

Bo adverted his gaze. Ashamed. She had always thought she was tough and seeking revenge was going to be easy but both turned out not to be true. In a fight eight out of ten times she would win but that was no match against so many or in a war. Revenge was what she drove on before meeting Gandalf, of course that was the thing she intended to do but there was a lot to learn and to explore. She learnt that mistake before, she had killed several orcs before but she was also caught and held captive before she escaped.

"They come and go." Bo replied. "I'm sorry for leaving the table but I didn't want anyone to see my weakness. It's just strange seeing them, I see we are not that different yet we are not completely the same. They have each other. They haven't lost all their families and friends, just a homeland and a king, which can be easily be restored...well easier than bringing back the dead." Bo grew quiet, she wiped her face and stared back in front of her. "They have their tale and I have mine. We're all different with our own stories to tell. Our home we sing, friends and family we talk to and have a drink with, and our adventures live inside us. Yet the home we remember won't be the same as it stands. People come and go, leave or die, soon it is just memories left and ghost that surround us. We won't have people who remember the same things as you do or won't laugh at the same memory...all things must past but life seems too precious to say good bye too, people are scared of dying because they won't be able to see their loved ones again or see the beauty of Middle Earth and breathe the free air. Yet if someone guided us through the darkness to see what's beyond its territory then I think we wouldn't be as scared."

Gandalf stared at Bo, he was always worried when he heard her speak like this but he knew she needed to get things off her chest. They all needed too. He found truth in her words. She was alone. Of course she had Gandalf and now the company of dwarves and hopefully Bilbo but none of them would account to of her own. She had no one to talk to about the past, things she remembered of being a young age, the things she learnt growing up and people she met, she had to keep the memory hidden and the questions unanswered. Unlike the dwarves, they had each other, to talk about the past, to talk about family and the days they remember to drink to forget certain times and laugh at jokes they used to share; whole different world.

Bo felt Gandalf's gaze upon her but she couldn't look at in his eyes. In to his blue-grey eyes, ones which held thought and concern. Silence was the only thing they heard, the dwarves seemed to be quiet or the walls of the hole were thicker than Bo thought. A few seconds passed before Bo lowered her eyes, wishing Gandalf would say something.

"Home. It seems different to each creature I assume." Bo stated breaking the silence. "The wild has become my home. Everything I was used too disappeared and erased from my mind. I forgot how safe you could feel when a roof is over your head and there is a door to close behind you. I forgot how welcome a fire is when its already burning to keep the house feel so…homely. I forgot how your troubles wash away when with family and friends." Bo stopped feeling her anger build up. She kicked a stone instead of punching something. "I want those orcs to pay on what they did, is that so much to ask for?"

"These are dangerous times I'm afraid Bo." Gandalf stated softly. "Your actions will count against you and that we don't need. We need you on our side and to be safe. I know it's hard but I promised you, you will get your chance of getting revenge but there is a shuttle way to do things…."

Bo stared at the wizard understanding what he meant but that weren't the answer she needed. However opening her mouth to speak, she heard the door close bringing her attention to it. She guessed someone was listening to her conversation but who it was the trickier answer.

"Bo, I will sort it out." Gandalf said. "Just stay out here until you feel better."

Bo let out a sigh but did what she was told. She had lived on her own for years, she was used to danger, the wild and unexpected dangers but she still listened to Gandalf as she knew she had a lot to learn, yet she knew there was another reason she obeyed to his orders, she was scared of her secret coming out….

Freedom she will never have. Though it looked like she may had it but she never felt it. She was locked within, looked down upon and an outsider, things she didn't want to be but grew to be, everyday becoming a challenge. Mountains she had to climb and found its secrets. Hills she stood on top of and saw what Middle Earth had to offer. Rivers and lakes she swam and saw what it could offer. Forests she hid within, climbed its trees and followed its tracks unaware what neighbours she had.

Being alone she had grew accustomed to her own company. The silence being the only sound. The darkness being her only shelter. Yet at the same time she tried to keep what was within hidden, her looks were distinctive what with her big black eyes, her pale skin, her ears sharp and her nose narrow, but at times she could keep those hidden and pretend to be normal.

"They don't know what it is like to be alone, drowning in deep thoughts." Bo stated quietly to herself.

"You be surprised."

Bo heard someone say, making her jump and turn her head to see Balin standing nearby. Bo rolled her eyes and turned to stare at the village below.

"What you see is what we want you to see." He stated. "Yes we are family and love each other's company but we got own story to tell. At times I love my own company as I can think clearly and can think of possibilities. But I know others think of home and of their families which they left to take back what they used to have." He stopped and stood next to Bo. "I heard what you said to Gandalf…I'm sorry what you have been through lass. Truly. Yet we are different of what we've lost and what we look like but we have the same goal, to take back our home land and to feel free. That is what keeps us going lass, though it may not seem likely but it's a massive thing to us and our honour."

Bo lowered her eyes before meeting the dwarf's eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm not use of having company and not a large one in fact. At times I forget where I am and think of myself. Old habits die old I guess."

"Come on lass, let's get back inside before they start noticing we've gone." Balin suggested softly and gestured to the door with his hand.

Bo smiled and thanked him for being understanding before following him inside. At the door she glanced to the sky once more and felt a bit of weight which was loaded upon her shoulders flutter away for the time being. She was glad she could talk to someone about her feelings and troubles.


	3. Chapter 3

**Here's the third chapter guys, sorry it is long but I hope you enjoy it :)**

* * *

Back inside, Bo stood in the hallway, the dwarves were running riot! But she knew they were acting like this because they had been travelling for many months without good food and drink, nowhere to call home and they were all together again.

"My dear Bilbo, what on earth is the matter?" Bo heard Gandalf ask the hobbit, before he could explode!

"What is the matter? I'm surrounded by dwarves. What are they doing here?" Bilbo replied trying not to let his anger show but the dwarves had made him hit his boiling point.

"That is what I want to know." Bo stated.

"Oh, they're quite a merry gathering, once you get used to them." Gandalf stated, it seemed he had ignored Bo's comment.

"I don't want to get used to them. The state of my kitchen- there's mud trod into the carpet, they've pillaged the pantry; I'm not even going to tell you what they've done in the bathroom. They've all but destroyed the pluming. I don't understand what they are doing in my house!"

Bo opened her mouth to speak but she quickly closed it again as she saw Gandalf's eyes on her, telling her this weren't the time. She huffed and folded her arms in protest.

"Excuse me, sorry to interrupt, but what should I do with my plate?" Ori asked Bilbo.

Bo stared at him, he was not like the others, she thought, he had manners and was quiet, except the burping earlier. However before Bilbo could answer his question, Fili told Ori to give it to him and threw it to Kili who stood behind Gandalf, then Kili threw it to Bifur who stood at the sink. The rest joined in. Soon dishes were flying around the house, Gandalf ducked and Bo placed her back against the wall, both avoiding to get hit.

"Excuse me, that's my mother's West Farthing crockery, it's over hundred years old." Bilbo exclaimed.

At that the four dwarves who sat the table begin rhythmically drumming on the table with utensils and their fists.

"Can-can you not do that?" Bilbo asked trying to get control over his house once more. He quickly added: "You'll blunt them!"

"You hear that lads?" Bofur asked. "He says we'll blunt the knifes."

_"Blunt the knives, bend the forks._

_Smash the bottles and burn the corks._

_Chip the glasses and crack the plates._

_That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!_

_Cut the cloth and tread on the fat._

_Leave the bones on the bedroom mate._

_Pour milk on the pantry floor._

_Splash the wine on every door._

_Dump the crocks in a boiling bowl._

_Pound them up with a thumping pole._

_And when you've finished, if they are whole,_

_Send them down the hall to roll._

_That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!"_

Bo eased and stepped away from the hall as the dwarves finished their singing. She followed Gandalf and Bilbo into the kitchen and saw all the plates and bowls all cleaned and stacked up neatly; all without a crack! She examined them as the dwarves laughed, she couldn't believe it either that all was cleaned and not cracked! Dwarves are weird creatures, Bo thought to herself. However everyone grew silent and the atmosphere grew to serious as there were three loud knocks on the door.

"He's here." Gandalf stated, making Bo stare at him confused.

Everyone followed Bilbo to the door and watched as he opened the door, to reveal another dwarf, yet he looked different on the account of his clothes, his structure and his manner he showed. It seemed he held authority as everyone was still silent as he walked in.

"Gandalf. I thought you said this place would be easy to find. I lost my way, twice. I wouldn't have found it at all had it not be that mark on the door." The dwarf explained.

"Mark? There's no mark on that door. It was painted a week ago." Bilbo explained confused.

"There is a mark; I put it there myself." Gandalf explained before closing the door.

"The hobbit really loves his stuff." Bo said quietly, getting annoyed how much Bilbo had moaned at the dwarves.

"Bilbo Baggins, allow me to introduce the leader of our company, Thorin Oakenshield."

"So, this is the hobbit. Tell me, Mr Baggins, have you done much fighting?" Thorin asked.

"Pardon me?"

"Axe or sword? What's your weapon of choice?"

"Well, I have some skill at conkers, if you must know." Bilbo replied quite proud of himself, but he quickly added: "But I fail to see why that's relevant."

"Thought as much. He looks more like a grocer than a burglar." Thorin commented before the dwarves laughed while walking back to the dining table.

The dwarves were calmer than earlier but Bo could see hunger in their eyes as they stared at Thorin. Bo stared at each one but none met her gaze, also none let out why they were hungry for. She stared back at Thorin and watched him eat his soup.

"What news from the meeting at Ered Luin? Did they all come?" Balin asked breaking the silence.

"Aye. Envoys of all seven kingdoms." Thorin replied.

"What do the dwarves of the Iron Hills say? Is Dain with us?" Dwalin asked.

"They will not come. They say this quest is ours and ours alone."

Disappointment grew throughout the room from the dwarves as they heard the bad news. Bo couldn't help but feel confused, what quest? What was Gandalf planning? Was all her questions going to be answered tonight?

"You're going on a quest?"

"Bilbo, my dear fellow, let us have a little more light." Gandalf said addressing the hobbit, he knew it was time to explain himself.

Bo watched as Gandalf brought out a map from his pocket. She stared confused as she hadn't laid eyes on it before. She saw a lot of images, telling her of the river or wood trail they would need to follow. Also writing which she didn't understand, an old language perhaps? Another thing which caught her attention was the bold, red image of the dragon on top of a mountain which stood alone.

"Far to the East, over ranges and rivers, beyond woodlands and wastelands, lies a single solitary peak." Gandalf started.

"The Lonely Mountain." Bilbo read while staring at it confused.

"Aye. Oin has read the portents, and the portents say its time." Gloin stated.

"Ravens have been seen flying back to the mountain as it was foretold: When the birds of old return to Erebor, the rein of the beast will end." His brother Oin explained.

"What beast?" Bilbo asked looking concerned.

"Well that would be a reference to Smaug the Terrible, chiefest and greatest calamity of our age. Airborne fire-breather, teeth like razors, claws like meat hooks, extremely found of precious metals." Bofur explained, making Bo stare at him with concern.

"Great so we got to kill a dragon." Bo stated sarcastic. "Why can't you guys do a simple quest? You really believe you can defeat Smaug and get your homes back?" Bo stopped as Gandalf nudged her in the ribs and smiled apologetic towards the dwarves.

"I'm not afraid! I'll give him a taste of the Dwarvish iron right up his jacksy!" Orin exclaimed, making everyone stare at him.

"Sit down!" His brother Dori ordered while pulling him down.

"The task will be difficult enough with an army behind us. But we number just thirteen. Not thirteen of the best, nor brightest." Bailn said, which started the dwarves to object, saying things like: ""Who are you calling dim?" "Watch it!" "No!"

"We may be few in number, but we're fighters, all of us, to the last dwarf!" Fili said breaking the objections.

"And you forget, we have a wizard in our company. Gandalf will have killed hundreds of dragons in his time." Kili added, making Bo stare at the wizard with a disbelief.

"Oh, well now, I wouldn't say-"The wizard started.

"How many then?" Dori asked cutting him off.

"I, uh, what?" Gandalf asked and Bo could feel he was getting embarrassed.

"How many dragons have you killed? Go on, give us a number!" Dori pressed on.

Bo heard Gandalf cough on his pipe smoke. She watched as the dwarves jumped onto their feet arguing about the number the wizard had killed.

Bo having enough stood up. "Shut up! You are fools even going on this quest, but you're more foolish for questioning Gandalf. You are lucky to have him on your side, he is one of the greatest wizards and don't dare question him again!"

Bo stared at the dwarves who stared back in shock, a few seconds passed before they were at it again. Bo stared at them confused. Letting out a heavy sigh she sat back down and turned to the wizard. "I did try Gandalf, but they are too stubborn."

"Thank you." He whispered.

"Atkât! [Silence!] If we have read these signs, do you not think that others will have read them too? Rumours have begun to spread. The dragon Smaug has not been seen for 60 years. Eyes look east to the Mountain, assessing, wondering, weighing the risk. Perhaps the vast wealth of our people now lies unprotected. Do we sit back while others claim what is rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back Erebor? Du Bekâr! Du Bekâr! [To arms! To arms!]"

Bo stared at Thorin as the dwarves cheered. She felt goosebumps form on her skin yet she was annoyed.

"You forget the front door is sealed. There is no way into the mountain." Balin pointed out breaking the joy.

"That, my dear Balin is not entirely true." Gandalf said before twiddling his fingers to produce a key, making everyone stare at him with awe and confusion.

"How did you came by this?" Thorin asked.

"It was given to me by your father, by Thrain, for safekeeping. It is yours now." Gandalf replied, before handing it over to the Thorin.

"If there is a key, there must be a door." Fili pointed out the obvious.

"These runes speak or a hidden passage to the lower halls." Gandalf pointed out onto the map with his pipe.

"There's another way in!" Kili exclaimed.

"If we can find it." Gandalf added. "Dwarf doors are invisible when closed. The answer lies hidden somewhere in this map and I do not have the skill to find it. But there are others in Middle-earth who can. The task I have in mind will require a great deal of stealth, and no small amount of courage. But, if we are careful and clever, I believe that it can be done."

"That's why we need a burglar." Ori explained, making Bo stare at him confused but slowly it dawned on her what the reason they were all there.

"And a good one too. An expert, I'd imagine." Bilbo agreed.

"And are you?" Gloin asked.

"Am I what?"

"He said he's an expert! Hey hey!" Oin cheered.

"Me? No, no ,no. I'm not a burglar; I've never stolen a thing in my life." Bilbo explained.

"I'm afraid I have to agree with . He's hardly burglar material." Balin said.

"Aye, the wild is no place for gentlefolk who can neither fight nor fend for themselves." Dwalin added.

Bo nodded in agreement, she knew the wild more than anyone thought. She had breathed and lived in the wild. She believed she knew the nooks and crannies of it, believed without Gandalf she could survive on her own, sword was her weapon along with daggers which were hidden.

However as Dwalin finished the dwarves began to argue again. Bo watched for a few seconds before turning to face Gandalf, she opened her mouth to speak but closed it as she saw him growing angry. She moved away slightly as he began to stand and cast darkness in the room.

"Enough! If I say Bilbo Baggins is a burglar, then a burglar he is." He stated powerfully. He quickly went back to his normal self before explaining: "Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose. And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage. You asked me to find the fourteenth member of this company, and I have chosen Mr. Baggins. There's a lot more to him than appearances suggest, and he's got a great deal more to offer than any of you know, including himself. You must trust me on this."

"Very well. We'll do it your way." Thorin said before ordering Balin to give Bilbo the contract.

"Alright we're off." Bofur exclaimed, it seemed to Bo he was excited to go on this quest.

"It's just the usual summary of out of pocket expenses, time required, remuneration, and funeral arrangements, so forth." Balin explained to the hobbit.

"Funeral arrangements?" Bilbo echoed confused.

Bo watched as he went back into the hall to read the contract and what was asked for him. She felt sorry for the young fellow, he was asked to go on this quest of not of his own, to face a dragon and steal! A heavy burden weighed on his little shoulders, yet it will continue to grow throughout the journey if he agreed. So many possibilities and impossibilities.

Her thoughts withered as Thorin leaned over to Gandalf and whispered to him, she couldn't hear what both said but she saw concern on the wizard's face. Whatever it was, it weren't good news. Burden too was upon the wizard's shoulders. Was anyone truly safe?

"Cash on delivery, up to but not exceeding one fourteenth of total profit, if any, the present company shall not be liable for injuries inflicted by or sustained as a consequence thereof including but not limited to lacerations ... evisceration … incineration?" Bilbo read out loud, bringing Bo's gaze upon him. "I feel a bit faint."

"Think furnace with wings." Bofur stated.

"Air, I need air." Bilbo added.

"Flash of light, searing pain, then Poof! you're nothing more than a pile of ash." Bofur explained, not making the situation better.

Bo wished she had something to throw at Bofur, to make him stop, instead she stared at Bilbo knowing he didn't look well. She watched as he tried to keep breathing, breathing heavily. She stood up ready to move but it was too late the hobbit fell onto the floor. She pushed back her chair and ran over to the hobbit.

"You're very helpful Bofur." Gandalf stated sarcastically, before kneeling next to Bo and rolled Bilbo over. Bo ordered Bofur to fetch some water for the hobbit and took the cloth from Gandalf and started to fan air to Bilbo. She felt everyone's eyes upon them but she didn't care.

…..

Bo sat in the dining hall still; alone. Bilbo came around and was in the sitting room with Gandalf, it had been some time since they were in there. She gave up on listening to their conversation. Could you make someone do something they don't want? Bo thought no, but that was before she met Gandalf, he had a way with persuading people.

_Thud. _Bo reached over and grabbed her dagger from the table, she twisted it a bit to get it out from the wood as it buried deep. Leaning back into her chair she threw it again. _Thud. _Again she received her small weapon and carried on. She knew Bilbo would be angry with her for marking his table but she was lost in thought.

She was thinking of the past yet again. The recent weeks they came more fluent, making her doubt if she were making parts up or if she turned a blind eye to them when she was younger but they found a way to be seen. Getting the dagger back from the table, she heard Gandalf say: "Well, all good stories deserve embellishment. You'll have a tale or two to tell of your own when you come back." She scoffed knowing it was true but the matter was if he'd come back. If they'd all come back. Danger was ahead, darkness followed behind them, cracks hidden misled them and the truth or the goal was out of their reach; it was all the same for everyone who stood up and followed their own noses.

As the dagger was in her hand, Bo let her eyes examine the handle. Rough at places, showing caved * letters which spelt "Warrior", it was what she named the dagger, though small in size, it didn't show it when in use, cutting open necks or veins; hungry for its enemies blood. It was the only thing she had from her home, well that and memories which were now full of ghosts, both carried by her and never left her. Her father taught her how to use the dagger in a fight and the other uses it had daily, she remembered she would practice whenever she could, her mother taught her about the world and how everyone was equal in death.

Bo raised her eyes to the metal of the dagger, she saw her own reflection, anger she saw in her eyes as her mind went back to the night when the orcs attacked. The screams and yells surrounded her. Smoke and blood she saw. Men grabbing their weapons and ordering their family to flee to safety, was what she could see through the metal, children crying to their mothers sensing danger. Alone she was now, no one to call friend, no one she could call for help or cry on anyone's shoulder. She learnt about the truth of the world the harsh way, but it made her feel stronger yet she felt like a child through people's eyes.

She missed being on her own, to sit in the wild surrounded by trees or hills or rivers, silence her only company on a good night or wild animals which smelt her food or want to share the warmth of the fire. Many times she had sat with bears, sharing her hunt and fire, at first she was scared and stared at the wild guests but she grew used to them and quickly felt safe. Yet being on her own had its price. It made her an easy target for some creatures to attack and for people to question her when she found an inn to stay in for a night, but that weren't worse of her problems, drowning in deep thoughts and not controlling her feelings were. While with Gandalf, he taught her own to control it all and how to use a bit of magic, just the basics which helped her defend herself, she was grateful for him to teach her those things but she still questioned why he asked her to be his apprentice, was there something more to her than anyone knew, or did Gandalf know something which could help her?

Who could she trust? That was the question which she wanted to know. Gandalf she thought but even he kept things away from her but the question there was it to protect her? Dwarves were hard to see through, they all stood together and were tough warriors. Elves, Bo didn't know a not a lot about but what she heard it seemed they saw weakness in everyone and some tried to protect Middle Earth from evil while some looked down on people. Hobbits only keep to their barriers and hope no evil come to them. Goblins and orcs, she would never trust, just the mention of them made her blood boil.

She looked up from her dagger, she felt someone's eyes on her. She quickly hid her dagger in her shirt and stood up before walking to the kitchen; all done without looking behind to see who it was. She didn't want to hear the same old questions. She heard them all before and she was sick and tired of saying the same thing, also they didn't have a right to know her past. Maybe that was the problem; keeping it all within and not trusting anyone, keeping the heavy load. Yet old habits die hard, as she stated earlier that evening, all the trust she had in the world was taken away at the same time when her world was turned upside down. She found it hard to express herself afterwards, she even had trouble with Gandalf, and it was what she taught herself; no to trust anyone.

"Far over the Misty Mountains cold  
To dungeons deep and caverns old  
We must away ere break of day  
To find our long-forgotten gold

The pines were roaring on the height  
"The winds were moaning in the night  
The fire was red, it flaming spread  
The trees like torches blazed with light"

Bo heard the dwarves sing. A slow but meaningful song, it was a song about the day Smuag came and destroyed their homeland and made them refuges. Standing at the sink, she looked out through the window and thought if there was any songs about her folk or about the night when Orcs came and killed them all, but she quickly came to the answer of no, as there was no one else but her. Her against the world, she believed.

…..

It was quiet in the hobbit hole, everyone was finally asleep. Bilbo was on his bed dreaming of something pleasant. Gandalf was sitting on a chair in the corner of the living room, his pipe still in his mouth, maybe he was half asleep? Some of the dwarves were sleeping in the living room on chairs or on the floor, the rest were in the dining hall or kitchen. Bo was curled up in front of the dying fire in the living room, all seemed peaceful but inside was a different story:

_Bo stood where her home used to stand. Houses made out of stone, she once thought they would last forever but now were rumble. The once fresh green grass now was brunt and never to grow. All around held an eerie silence. She saw nothing or anyone in fact. Confusion laced with anger she felt as she walked around; forcing herself on. Smoke was drifting still in the sky above, a sign to tell the event was recent. She could feel the warmth from the wreckage as she walked through what used to be full of her own. Coming to what looked like the other rumble in the area, Bo stopped and stared, letting her eyes examine the damage. What used to stand was a house full of love, warmth and comfort. Now all was gone, what was left behind was cold, stiffness and ghosts. Daring herself to walk through the rumble, Bo could picture what she remembered before. Stones sturdy. Fire alight in its place. A house full of people. Love and comfort all around. Bo torn her head away stopping the tears that formed. Anger built within. _

_Bo looked behind her as she heard harsh voices and harsh sniffs coming towards her. She couldn't see anything as the smoke increased and thickened. She knew there was only two choices and she picked one, which would follow her forever and make her doubt of her own actions. She ran for it! She ran into the forest which was nearby and didn't stop. The moon was her only guide and still was._

_However the scene changed. The scene showed trees were growing over her, the ground was much closer and she could hear things which were miles away. She could hear herself pant hard as if she had been running, looking up she saw the moon high in the sky; letting its light guide her through the forest. Stopping, Bo could see a river which flowed right through the land, she could hear her insides calling out for the water. At the bank she lowered her head and stopped seeing a pair of piercing eyes stare back at her, confused she lowered her head further and saw a wolf staring back at her. She looked up seeing nothing there or anyone, panic overpowered her and made her look back into the water and saw it was her who was the wolf!_

Bo's eyes opened widely and she sat up, she looked around her and saw she was still in the hobbit hole, safe and with Gandalf. Staring before her she tried calming down but she couldn't help but think of nightmare. She had longed for freedom, yet she was sacred to be on her own.


	4. Chapter 4

Early morning light streamed through the hobbit hole, quiet still inside and outside the birds were wide wake catching their breakfast and talking to their neighbours. The sun was set in the eastward, cloudless sky ready for another day. All held peace and beauty, something Bo wished she could live with but she knew she would never find peace within these lands. She had seen too much war and blood, to ever see the truth that still remains around, darkness she knew and believed would grow strong, is there too much goodness to defeat darkness? Only time will tell. Time which is precious to keep yet it is easily devoured when you have the chance.

Bo sat in front of the dead fire. She hadn't go back to asleep since that nightmare she had, maybe she was truly scared? She thought being a shape shifter be fun, roaming around freely, having freedom and being what you truly are but she learnt when turned you are not yourself, your brain is of the wild animal and all the senses is gone. She knew what that meant, she had tried to control it over the years, fearfully of hurting people, most importantly Gandalf but there was the dwarves to consider about, she couldn't put their lives at risk. Being on her own she was less careful of what she was, she was not near anyone so she couldn't hurt them and they couldn't hurt her, it was a lonely business but safe.

Rubbing her eyes with her knuckles, Bo let out a yawn before standing up to stretch. Standing she looked around and saw everyone was still asleep, she took the opportunity to walk out the living room and to the front door. She just needed some air.

"Bo?" She heard Gandalf whisper as her hand was on the handle. "Where do you think you're going?"

"I'm just going out. I need some air." Bo replied with a smile.

"You've had those nightmares again?" He asked following her out.

Bo walked to the fence and stared out to the village. She was confused how he knew a lot about her, more than she knew herself, yet she had her guesses. "You seem to know a lot Gandalf that is a huge amount of burden upon your shoulders." Bo replied. "Why do you take people's burdens?"

"If we all left people to their own devices, this world would be more dangerous. Darkness is a hard thing to tame, it takes time and patience, and I just give advice to those who I think need my help." He replied before pulling out his pipe and smoke it.

"Are you scared of anything?" Bo asked after a few seconds.

"Everyone is scared of something, my dear, a lot of people are scared of the common things like spiders, snakes, rats and so forth. Some are scared of not so common things. Some are scared of the unknown." He replied. He glanced at Bo, wondering where this was leading to. "But yes I'm scared of something, it is only natural. However you got to overcome these things or find a way around it. Why do you ask?"

Bo lowered her eyes, unsure how to answer. "These nightmares I keep having…I believe they'll come true. I'm scared of my true self. I know it sounds daft but when a wolf, I cannot remember anything at all, all of me is animal; nothing human is left." Bo licked her lips feeling shaky, her surroundings blurred telling her tears were forming in her eyes. She pulled her shirt closer to her body, though not cold but for comfort; the only comfort she had left. Letting out a heavy sigh, she turned to face Gandalf to add: "I don't want to hurt. I'm scared if I cannot control it all the time! They don't deserve knowing me…the real me. No one does! I'm just a burden and I don't want to put anyone in more danger. You should have left me alone. I…I'm sorry…I just cannot risk it Gandalf."

Tears rolled down her cheeks, leaving streaks in their wake. Bo wiped them away with her sleeve, but they carried on forming. She turned to leave, but Gandalf put his hand on Bo's shoulder, pulling her back, so he could wrap his arms around her and let her cry. Only a few times he had seen her cry, Bo weren't the type to show emotion, yet he knew she kept all within driving her mad! At times he even doubted his choice of making her his apprentice knowing the circumstances and dangers, but he knew most people deserve second chances and he felt Bo was one of them, maybe there was something else of his choice? Only time will time.

….

Lush, green grass surrounded the unusual company. Trees stood in rows as if soldiers letting them leave the Shire and enter the dangers of the wild, their strange smells and hopes and dreams be forgotten when the wind would blow through, maybe if they returned they would be remembered with joy and hope? Riding along beside Gandalf, Bo wished she could relaxed just a little but the nightmare was on her mind still. They were becoming more real, she noted, something she feared. Feeling Gandalf's eyes upon her, she shook the thought away for the time being and concentrate on the road. They were all on horses, mixture of hope, fear and joy, Bo could sense about the group, yet Bilbo weren't with them, something she knew Gandalf was disappointed on but not even he could….

"Wait! Wait!" They heard someone shout.

The company pulled their reins to stop their horses, and turned to see who it was. Bo's eyes expressed what she was feeling; confused. So he finally came, Bo thought, Gandalf be happy then.

"I signed it!" The hobbit exclaimed excitingly, giving the contract to Balin who was near the front.

Bo watched with confusion as Balin took the contract and brought out a pocket-glass to inspect it. He then quickly smiled before saying: "Everything appears to be in order. Welcome, Master Baggins, to the company of Thorin Oakenshield."

A chorus of cheer erupted around Bo, but it soon ended when Thorin ordered them to give him a pony.

"No, no, no, that won't be necessary. I'm sure I can keep on foot. I-I-I've done my fair of walking holidays, you know. I even got as far as Frogmorton once-"

Bo couldn't help but smile as Bilbo was cut off by two dwarves as they picked him up and placed him on a horse. However she forced herself to look straight on, seeing Bilbo looking terrified. He had a lot to learn, Bo thought to herself, no pressure for Gandalf whenever trouble comes.

"Come on, Nori, pay up." Bo heard Oin call.

Nori tossed a sack of money to Oin, which began some to confess up and tossed their money to those who won the bet. Bo watched with confusion, she had truly missed something last night.

"What's that about?" Bilbo asked the question Bo wanted to know.

"Oh, they took wagers on whether or not you'd turn up. Most of them bet that you wouldn't." Gandalf replied.

"What did you think?" Bilbo asked.

Before the wizard could reply, someone tossed their money to him and he put it in his bad. "My dear fellow, I never doubted you for a second."

Quickly Bilbo sneezed loudly before saying: "All this horse hair, I'm having a reaction." However he fell quiet for a few seconds looking for his handkerchief. "No, wait, wait, stop! Stop! We have to turn around!"

The company stopped again; annoyed. They all turned to stare at him.

"What on earth is the matter?" Gandalf asked.

"I forgot my handkerchief." He replied.

"Really? Oh no, now Middle Earth will fall into doom!" Bo stated sarcastically. "It be fine at home, no one will take it and be where you left it when you come back."

Bilbo stared at Bo for a few seconds not sure how to take the comment but he saw something fly towards him and he caught it. He quickly looked at what he caught and saw it was a filthy rag. The dwarves laughed and carried on their journey. Bo rolled her eyes, he had truly a lot to learn.

"You'll have to manage without pocket- handkerchiefs and a good many other things, Bilbo Baggins, before we reach our journey's end. You were born to the rolling hills and little rivers of the Shire, but home is now behind you; the world is ahead."

….

Night came, thankfully for others like Gloin who was asleep, snoring away. Flies were unlucky enough to be close to him and kept on being dragged into his mouth and back out. Fili and Kili sat by the fire, Bo sat just slightly away, she weren't that tired but she prevented going to sleep for amount of time she could and Gandalf too was awake. It seemed Bilbo couldn't get to sleep and decided to walk over to his pony.

Bo stared at the fire, concern expressed on her face as she was lost within her own thoughts. All colour turned to grey. All sounds drowned out. Nothing but flickering images of her nightmare flared up in the fire flame. If alone she would have turned as she didn't have no one to put in danger, but she was with the company, fourteen lives in danger if she ever changed, yet what if she recovered from turning, would they want her to carry on alongside them?

Her thoughts stopped as she heard a familiar sound. She looked up and turned her head to the right. She couldn't see anything but outlines of trees on the other side of the cliff, was dark but only to be lighted by the moon.

"What was that?" Bilbo asked.

"Orcs." Kili replied.

Bo stared straight ahead, mixture of fear and anger she felt. She hadn't heard anything from those vile creatures for many years, had they been hiding? She felt Gandalf's eyes upon her again and she knew he was worried what her actions would be.

"Throat-cutters. They're be dozens of them out there. The lowlands are crawling with them." Fili explained.

"They strike in the wee small hours, when everyone's asleep. Quick and quiet; no screams, just a lot of blood." Kili added.

Bo stared at them angrily. Seeing them laughing. If they only knew the truth, she thought. She pulled out a dagger in anger and stood up, however she weren't going to hurt the young dwarves. No instead she turned and stormed off. Darkness surrounded her. Nothing came as comfort no more. All she left to remember was before and the scene of after. She had no one to share memories, to express herself easily too, to call a friend or family; all she knew and learnt was taken away.

Fire they stared and spread, it now lived within Bo. Nothing could tame it. Her anger was a stronger force than any, yet with anger her wolf like growl came out, revelling the truth, another reason she kept her feelings within.

Heading down the cliff, trees started to surround her, the only light was the moon. Her thoughts trailed back to the nightmare of last night, all senses gone and replaced with a wolves! She had been panting, why had she been running? Did she hunt food down or was someone chasing her?

"Bo!" She heard Gandalf call.

She didn't stop. She couldn't face him. She couldn't face any of them. She needed to face it alone, she thought. They were safer without her. A burden to carry and reminder in their journey; something they didn't need. Alone, was what she missed, she had no one to trouble or share the burden. She could defend herself, she had done it ever since at a young age….

"Bo!" She heard Balin call.

"Where are you?" She heard Ori and Dori asked.

"Bo!" Bofur called.

Bo stopped. She looked behind her, guilt crept in as she heard their voices. They were risking their lives to search for her, they were worried about her, she hadn't heard that for years. Her mother used to be worried about her, telling her to be careful when climbing trees and when out, but since she was taken away, Bo lived a dangerous life, being a lone ranger and surviving the wild by herself, found her in many dangerous situations.

Looking up the moon, she felt her chest tighten. The wolf within was calling to be released. She knew if she held it in, time would pick its moment and reveal itself. Hearing movement she snapped her head to the left and narrowed her eyes, movement sounded to her right and she did the same. She gripped her dagger tightly and grabbed another, ready for whatever it was. She lowered to crouch, her temperature raised, the moon seemed to be brighter. The movements came closer, hearing a snapped twig, she threw one dagger to the right but it embedded in a tree trunk, yet it seemed time had chosen its moment to reveal itself. She fell to her knees and let go of the dagger so she could grip the ground with her fingertips. Pain was what she felt, along with tiredness. She couldn't control it no more. She was far too weak to overcome it….

"Bo!" She heard Gandalf call, it seemed he was getting closer.

"No! Don't come near me." Bo shouted before she let out a yell of pain. "No, no, no, no." She whimpered in pain, as she laid on the ground.

Twigs snapping underneath feet, branches being cut and heavy footsteps was what she heard. She was too weak to stand or even move. Pain raced through her. She felt the moon's cold heat on her tough skin, her surroundings became sharper than before.

"Bo!" She head Gandalf, she looked up and saw him running towards her. He knelt down beside her and rolled her to her back.

"I'm sorry. I did try." Bo whispered before holding her stomach in pain.

"Bo?" She heard Balin call, but seeing what was happening he stepped back and held back the others.

"Boil some water, and collect three leave clovers." Gandalf ordered them. As they left, Gandalf turned to young Bo. "We'll get you back to normal. I promise."

Bo smiled but her features slowly soften to slowly fall. Her face grown extremely pale, cold sweat made her hair plant on her face. Her chest fell but never to be raisin for some time. Gandalf raised his hand and closed her eyelids, before whispering: "Sleep now Bo, we will fight the wolf this time."


	5. Chapter 5

**I just want to say a massive thank you to my 'sister' Anja who rereads my work and helps me where I've gone wrong and on my grammer. Also to those who are patience to read it. I don't own anything except my OC Bo, but everything belongs to the brillant Tolkien :) **

* * *

Daylight came quite quickly, though the company was thankful for the light. But the weather weren't on their side as they travelled through a muddy forest as it rained. Bo clutched her cloak tighter to her body, feeling cold, her hood up to prevent her head to get wet. Also to prevent seeing the other's faces. Questions she knew they had for her, she sensed their unease as they rode, she figured the others didn't know about last night but those who cared and dared to go after her knew and she couldn't face them. She didn't know what to say. Words formed in her mind, but when she wanted to speak they all got stuck in the back of her throat, piling on top of each other making her chocke on them like a noose. A quick short death at the end, yet it was the waiting that did no good.

"Mr. Gandalf, can't you do something about this deluge?" Dori asked breaking the silence.

"It is raining, Master Dwarf, and it will continue to rain until the rain is done. If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard." Gandalf replied.

"Are there any?" Bilbo spoke up.

"What?"

"Other wizards?"

"There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman, the White. Then there are the two Blue wizards; you know, I've quite forgotten their names."

"And who is the fifth?"

"Well, that would be Radagast, the Brown." Gandalf replied, hearing the name of the other wizard made Bo smile.

"Is he a great Wizard or is he…more like you?"

Gandalf turned and Bo could see he was slightly offended, but he weren't the one to take it so heavily. Instead he answered the hobbit's question: "I think he's a very great wizard, in his own style. Bo also likes him. He's a gentle soul who prefers the company of animals to others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forest lands to the East, and a good thing too, for always Evil will look to find a foothold in this world."

Bo smiled, wondering what the brown wizard was doing at that time. She hadn't heard anything from him for a few months now, and she had a tendensy to worry when she didn't hear anything from him. Yet Gandalf always put it down to; he was busy or we'll hear from him soon. Yet days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months, the longest she had ever waited! Even a few words would do; just telling her he was fine, or the animals were doing well, anything to settle her nerves.

That was the only thing which kept her mind off the nightmares before the quest, it filled her mind with worry but of someone else and not herself. When turned, Radagast was the only one who kept her calm, along with Gandalf, but he didn't have the power like his fellow wizard. He kept her tamed in other words which was good news. He always told her, she was like a pet wolf, she always wanted to play and wanted a snuggle, but when sensing danger she would tell him and go with him to sort out the danger which occurred. He had a way with her, like with all animals around him, and with him she could be the wolf she wanted to be, not the wild, uncontrolled creature she feared and hated.

…..

Daylight was short for another day. The company found what looked like a burnt house and nature taking back what was rightfully hers before, the grass was long and entered the premisses of whatever folk lived there before. The sun was out, the group seemed to be more relaxed, happy to stop for that day. As Bo helped to unload the horses, Gandalf and Thorin went off, however as she walked towards the house a bit later, she stopped as she saw Gandalf storm towards her. Confusion and concern expressed on her face as the wizard passed her, she started to follow unsure what happened.

"Gandalf, what happened?" Bo asked. "Where are you going?"

"To seek the company of the only around here who's got any sense." He stated angrily.

"Who's that?" Bilbo asked.

"Myself, Mr Baggins! I've had enough of dwarves for one day." He shortly replied before adding to Bo: "You stay here."

Bo stopped hearing the anger in his voice . She watched as he stormed off, leaving her behind with the others; not even turning back to see what he was leaving behind. He had promised her that he would keep her safe, to help her and the company, but now he was leaving them, it was unlike him.

"Is he coming back?" She heard Bilbo ask Balin, but there was no answer.

"He has to." Bo replied instead. "He promised. He's never broken his promises before." She fell silent as she felt anger build up within. She stepped forward as to disobey Gandalf as he disobeyed his loyalty and his promise but feeling a hand upon her elbow, she looked down and saw it was Balin.

"Come on lass, he'll be alright. He is Gandalf after all." He stated softy. "Whatever dangers lies ahead, he will know and he will overcome it. He doesn't need you to run off, or to worry about him, he be back. I promise."

Bo stared at the older dwarf unsure about his words, however she looked back to where Gandalf walked off and she couldn't see him no more. Letting out a sigh, she lowered her eyes.

"Come on, Bombur, we're hungry." Thorin ordered.

Hearing Thorin, Bo looked at him with anger. Something happened in that empty building, he had said something to upset Gandalf. She stormed towards him, anger controlling her. Only paces away from Thorin, four dwarves held her back by holding her shirt tightly and bringing her arms behind her. Dwalin stood before his leader, his axes drawn out.

"What did you say to him?" Bo asked. "What did you say, to make him leave?"

"Do you know who you are speaking to, lass?" Dwalin asked angrily, however he lower his axes as Thorin put his hand on his shoulder.

Thorin stepped out to stand next to his faithful friend. He stared Bo in the eyes, not afraid of her. "It was his choice, not mine. He made it himself. He didn't like my plan of staying here, but I see no problem. You can go after him, no one is stopping you."

Bo glared at him but found no words to say. Letting out a heavy sigh, the dwarves who held her let go and watched her storm away. Balin stepped forward but he knew she needed to be alone to calm down, he stared with concern, he truly felt sorry for the lass but he knew he couldn't do anything to help; only to bring comfort of words and wisdom. Bilbo stared after Bo as well, he was confused and shocked as to why she acted like she did, but it seemed the wizard and the girl were close, closer than any of them knew and based on that he left her be for the time being. Also he had to adimt to himself, he was slightly frightened of her.

…

Night fell, the air was filled with the smell of the soup Bombur was preparing. Hunger mixed with worry ran through the camp but none spoke of what they felt or thought. Was Gandalf truly gone? He had been gone for hours, there was no sign of him and no word, shouldn't they go and look for him?

Bo was sitting on top of a big boulder that was outside the camp, she had been there after the quarrel. No one disturbed her, she guessed they were scared of her but she didn't care. She knew caring what others think would cost her and with times it would put her in a weak position. Evil used love to get what it wanted, many people found their loved ones gone, taken or their pride or property damaged. Something Bo knew all too much and learnt too quickly. A reason why she chose to be alone and built a barrier around herself; to prevent people to come in, she couldn't face to say goodbye to anyone else.

Hugging her legs tightly, Bo buried her chin against her legs, she lowered her eyes to stare at the stone before her. Her secret was known to four of the company, she knew they were scared but didn't know if they could keep quiet, could she risk it and carry on with them, or was it safer to leave?

She needed answers but she was stuck in-between, preventing her to develop decisions. Gandalf was gone. He was angry. He was not a person to mess with when angry. She knew that. She had to admit, she hadn't really seen much of the wizard's angry side, but he could be stubborn at times and thought he knew best. She learned not to question him, yet that didn't stop her when he kept her in the dark; like before.

_"Gandalf, you want some rabbit?" Bo asked, as she placed the cook rabbit on a plate. Hearing nothing, she looked up and saw him sitting under a tree, smoking his pipe quietly. "Gandalf?" She called but again he didn't answer._

_She stared confused but lowered her eyes to start to cut the meat. She thought the wizard was over the argument they had earlier. Mind you, it wasn't a massive argument, but both were hungry, bored and had only each other for company; nothing fun to sit around for hours, thinking, smoking, hunting and no one to find._

_She stood up and walked over to the wizard. She stretched her hand to give him the plate of food, but he didn't move an inch, his eyes still stared at the fire. Letting out a sigh, she put the plate in front of him and went back to serve herself. "Thank you, would be nice to hear for once." She muttered to herself. "I cook and I hunt for him but he never says thank you, I can't help it if folk don't believe him, yet he takes out on me!"_

_That night Bo woke up hearing movement to the left of the camp, she stared in darkness holding her breath, waiting for more sounds but none came. She looked around and saw the wizard to be nowhere! Quickly she grabbed her weapons and went to follow where the noise came from. A few times she heard twigs being snapped and branches being swung back to let the thing through. Finally she found herself at a clearing, trees were far back as if scared of heights! She stood at the top of a hill. Looking around she Gandalf standing at the edge, it seemed he was looking down at a kingdom not that far away from where they stood._

_She walked to stand next to the wizard and stared at the stone houses. She remembered he left her at the camp before without uttering a word of where he was going or when he was coming back. After a few days, he finally came back but Bo was angry and expressed her feelings. She hated being kept in the dark and being left behind, but she knew Gandalf could do what he pleased as he was a wizard and not used of company such as Bo, yet why did he pick her?_

_"Everything looks so peaceful." Bo stated, while staring out to the kingdom, everything was quiet, everyone was asleep and the moon shone bright. Yet something niggled at the back of her mind as she stared, was it the unusual quietness or the peaceful looking scenery that disturbed her? "Why you standing here Gandalf? I thought an intruder came to camp, but when I found you gone…I didn't know what to think!" She stared at the wizard again but frowned when he didn't reply. "Why aren't you talking to me? Is it because I shouted at you earlier? If so I'm sorry, but I'm sick and tired of being treated like if I'm nothing. You keep me in the dark, and treat me like I'm not here. Do you want me here Gandalf? If not all you got to do is say and I'll leave, I won't bother you again."_

_A few seconds past full of silence. Confusion, anger and disbelief filled Bo as she continued to stare at the silent wizard. She rolled her eyes, while letting out a heavy sigh, she turned to face the kingdom to see what Gandalf was staring at, but nothing jumped out to her._

_"Fine have it your way. I'm off." Bo stated angrily before turning to go._

Bo wiped the tears that rolled down her face. She remembered that night all too well, she kept it hidden and didn't speak about it with Gandalf, she didn't know if he remembered that night or not. She could remembered walking back to the camp and grabbed all her things, which were the remaining of her weapons and cloak, and walked off. Many days and nights she was alone, she tried to wipe the wizard from her mind, but she couldn't. However as she found an inn in the kingdom, all didn't felt right.

Fire. One of the powerful sources known to man, one that can wipe everything way in a few seconds and can do serious damage. She couldn't remember how it all started, but she remembered be trapped in barn, when trying to free the horses, the exists were blocked by the fallen roof and fire increasing! Too much smoke she inhaled causing her to pass out, she thought it was the end, the last word she remembered saying was 'sorry'. She guessed she was sorry what she said to Gandalf, sorry for being a burden on him, sorry for being the only one left, sorry for being cold and distant…

"Here's some soup, lass."

The words brought her out of her trail of thought, and the memories was again just that, memories.

Balin stood beside her, holding the bowl out, so she could take it, but she didn't move an inch, frozen by the painful thoughts of her troubled past. He let out a sigh. "You got to keep up your strength, we still got a long journey ahead of us and we don't know what dangers lurks about. Also we need you to fight that wolf inside you, we need the Bo we know and not the wolf."

Bo stared at him and suddenly the world came back to her. She knew he cared about her, but why? She weren't anything to him or the others, while the others kept their distance when they could, Balin did not. Licking her lips, she could hear her stomach rumble, giving in to the smell of the soup, she leaned over and grabbed the bowl from Balin, she smiled her thanks. Sitting back up, she took the spoon and took a mouthful, it was nothing like she'd ever tasted before. Yet feeling Balin's eyes upon her, she lowered the spoon and stared back at him confused.

"Sorry, it's rude for staring." Balin stated before turning to go.

"No, it's ok." Bo said calmly. "Can I ask you a question Balin?" Seeing the dwarf stop and turn to face her again, she lowered her bowl and brushed her fingers through her hair before starting

"Why are you so kind to me? No one else bothers. You've seen what I can be…well not truly, but still..."

Balin smiled softly. "Aye, that is true lass, but we're all different. You know that. That is the special thing about us folk, we all have different personalities and abilities." He turned his head to face the camp. "Take us lot for example; Dwalin ,my brother, is a warrior and is like a lieutenant, never doubting Thorin's orders. Thorin, yes he might be stubborn, but a true fighter and leader. However ,when given the chance, he means well with his words and knows how to protect his people. Fili and Kili, yet young in age they show strength in their fighting, also Ori has strength which some of us don't have, his heart, he believes the world can be at peace again. Which is only a hope to us others." Balin turned back to look at Bo. "We are old warriors, bankers, toy markers, and nothing of royal blood, but we make a good team; something folks will learn not to mess with again. You are not a monster Bo, you have a wolf within you, but I know you can be loyal, kind and reasonable, yet you are lost and afraid. I believe you can overcome your inner self, if that is what you want, if not I will support your decision and wish you luck. That is why I am kind to you lass, no one deserves bitterness and hardship, only those vile creatures. I'll leave you to eat your soup before it gets cold."

Bo watched as the old dwarf walked away, she consider his words and she was thankful for him to be true and understanding. She turned to her bowl and started to eat the soup, her stomach thankful for the food and her body grateful for the heat from the soup as it ran down her throat.

As she was done, Bo knew it was time for her to re-enter the camp. She climbed down and took the bowl with her, as she entered the camp, she sensed tension among the dwarves but she ignored them.

She went over to Bofur and handed him the bowl back to him and smiled. "The soup was wonderful, best I've ever tasted, thank you." She said and saw him return the smile before she waked towards Thorin, she stopped a few paces and felt everyone's gaze upon her, ready to pull her back if need be. "I came to say sorry on my actions earlier, it was uncalled for and I hope you can accept my apology."

However before Thorin could say anything, Fili and Kili ran back to the camp, their face alerted! All the dwarves stared with confusion but noticed Bilbo wasn't with them, they sensed danger.

"Trolls over in the forest!" Kili explained.

"Bilbo is with them!" Fili added, which made everyone stare at Thorin.

"Grab your weapons." Thorin ordered without hesitation. "And wait for my orders."

It was all too quick for Bo to follow and put into much detail, but as she crouched behind a bush near where the Trolls were camping for the night, she couldn't believe what she was seeing, Bilbo was behind a Troll trying to get his knife. What was he playing at? She asked herself, he's going to get himself killed! If only those dwarves kept an eye on the bloody ponies…what if Gandalf was here? What would he say to all this? Would he even care? Would he use his magic to defend them all? Bo shook her head, Gandalf weren't there, nor was he coming back, it was the company and her left to defend themselves against dangers such as trolls!

Bo stared at her hands feeling the moon's cold light on her skin, Balin's words of earlier echoed through her mind: _"You are not a monster Bo, you have a wolf within you, but I know you can be loyal, kind and reasonable, yet you are lost and afraid."_ Was he right? What if he saw her as a wolf, saw her kill animals and hurt innocent folk, would he think the same? Did he understand the consequences of being a shape shifter, the animal controlling the body, all senses gone and no memory of the human life? He was right that she was lost and afraid, but did he know why. Did he have the answers? How did one dwarf master all that? To know how one felt and thought? Expressing was something she weren't good at and at times it ended up someone being hurt….

"I said, drop him!" She heard Kili shout to the trolls, bringing her out of her deep thoughts.

She watched as the troll that held Bilbo threw him towards Kili, the hobbit landed on Kili; knocking both of them down. However as all seemed lost, the rest of the company sprang out of their hiding places and began to fight. It didn't matter that the trolls were much taller and stronger than them, the dwarves were faster and smarter than the trio. Bo was stood up and stood at the edge of the camp, why weren't she fighting alongside the others? She was unsure if they needed her there, she was a burden, not all cared for her and none cared like Gandalf. Was one life more worthy than all?

_"You are not a monster Bo,"_ Balin's words carried on echoing through her mind. She looked back down at her hands, before closing her eyes and murmuring ancient words, which formed a bright light in her hands. As she finished she looked at the scene before her and threw the light towards one of the trolls, as it hit her target there was a big explosion, causing the trolls to be unsteady on their feet. She smiled and drew her sword and joined in the fight, causing the trio as much pain she could.

However as all seemed to be on the company's side, they all stopped hearing Kili shout Bilbo's name in horror. They all looked up seeing the hobbit being held between two of the trolls, each holding one arm and leg, making them all huddle together, scared what was going to happen next.

"Lay down your arms, or we'll rip his off." One said, no hint of bluff in his words.

Thorin was the first to throw his sword on the ground, then the others followed his lead; lastly Bo did the same. They were all in trouble and all their plans were useless against the trolls, as they started to put the dwarves into sacks, rope pulled tightly around their hands to prevent them from escaping, some were tied onto a spit over the camp fire, however they tied Bo's hands behind her back and put her in a sack, throwing her to the ground with the others. Sitting near the dwarves, she tried to form magic but it was no good, instead she tried pulling the rope which was tied around her wrists, yet it was no good either. She gave up, anger built up, angry at herself mostly for getting into the situation.

"Why bother cooking them? Let's just sit on them and squash them into jelly." One troll asked.

"They should be sautéed and grilled with a sprinkle of sage." Another said.

"Ooh, that does sound quite nice." The first troll said, liking that idea.

Fear was what the dwarves felt, they all wished they were somewhere else. Somewhere being far away from the trolls and not being cooked alive! Was this their fate? To begin a long journey to be ended like this?

"Never mind the seasoning; we ain't got all night! Dawn ain't far away, so let's get a move on. I don't fancy being turned to stone." The third troll said, making Bo stare at him and then at the sky.

"Wait! You are making a terrible mistake." Bilbo stated, making everyone stare at him.

"You can't reason with them, they're half-wits!" Dori stated.

"Half-wits? What does that make us?" Bofur asked.

Bo watched as Bilbo managed to stand up and faced the trolls, confusion expressed on her face but she guessed he had a plan. He did have a plan right?

"I meant with the, uh, with the seasoning." Bilbo added.

"What about the seasoning?" The second troll asked.

"Well have you smelt them? You're going to need something stronger than sage before you plate this lot up." Bilbo replied, making the dwarves yell at him calling him a traitor.

Bo narrowed her eyes but lowered her head to smell herself. The expression of disgust was expressed on her face, before she stared at Bilbo again. He's got a point, she thought.

"What do you know about cooking dwarf?" The first troll asked.

"Shut up. Let the, uh, flurgaburburrahobbit talk." The third troll said.

"Uh, the secret to cooking dwarf is um" Bilbo started.

"Yes? Come on, tell us the secret."

"Um, yes, I'm telling you, the secret is…to skin them first!"

Horror expressed on Bo's face as she heard the hobbit suggest such a thing! She weren't a dwarf but trolls could manage to eat anything they could get their hands onto. She heard major objections thrown towards the hobbit, they threaten to beat and kill him!

"Tom, get me the filleting knife!"

"What a load of rubbish! I've eaten plenty with their skins on. Scuff them, I say, boots and all." The one called Tom said.

"He's right! Nothing wrong with a bit of raw dwarf! Nice and crunchy." One said before picking Bombur and dangled him upside down over his mouth, making Bo turn away in disgust.

"Not that one, he's infected!" Bilbo exclaimed quickly.

"You what?" Tom asked.

"He's got worms in his…tubes."

The troll which held Bombur dropped him back into the pile of dwarves in disgust. Bo stared back at the hobbit, she knew he was making it all up, it seemed he was buying time until dawn approached.

"In fact they all have it, they're all infested with parasites. It's a terrible business; I wouldn't risk it, I really wouldn't."

"Parasites, did he say parasites?" Oin asked.

"We don't have parasites! You have parasites!" Kili shouted.

That started the whole company in chime in and didn't follow the hobbit's plan. Bo growled in anger, she was sick of being tied up and hearing the trolls discuss how they were going to eat them. She didn't plan of dying today, but being eaten wasn't one of them. Quickly she saw Thorin kicking the others, to say to go with the plan.

"I've got parasites as big as my arm." Oin stated.

"Mine are the biggest parasites, I've got huge parasites." Kili added, before the company started to say they all have parasites.

"What would you have us do then, let 'em all go?" Tom asked.

"Well…"

"You think I don't know what you're up to? This little ferret is taking us for fools!"

"Ferret?" Bilbo echoed confused.

"Fools?" One troll echoed Tom.

"The dawn will take you all!" Bo heard Gandalf shout, she turned her head to the left and saw him standing on a large rock before the camp. A smile formed on her face, happy to see the wizard.

"Who's that?" One troll asked.

"No idea." Tom said.

"Can we eat him too?" The other asked.

Before anyone knew what was going on, Gandalf struck the rock with his staff making it split in half, allowing the sunlight behind it to pour into the camp. Quickly the light hit the trio, and the camp was full of loud screams and howls of pain but within seconds they were just stone statues. Everyone cheered and waited for him to release them from the spit or sack.

….

As Bo was freed from the sack, she quickly found herself wrapping her arms around Gandalf and thanked him for coming back. She let go and felt her cheeks turn red with embarrassment, but it seemed he didn't mind as he smiled back at her.

"Where did you go to, if I may ask?" Thorin asked.

"To look ahead." Gandalf replied simply.

"What brought you back?"

"Looking behind. Nasty business. Still, you are all in one piece."

"No thanks to your burglar."

"He had the nous to play for time. None of the rest of you thought of that."

Bo stood next to Gandalf and stared at Thorin, she hoped he wouldn't say what happened after Gandalf left, her outburst wasn't what she intended to do, and she didn't want the wizard to worry about her. Luckily they examined the now stoned trolls, confused how they moved so far south, and came to an idea that there must be a cave nearby.

Bo followed them to find a large cave nearby the camp, the rest followed and entered it. Treasure was what they found, which the trolls had been hoarding, which confused Bo as she looked through it, gold coins, weapons and precious stones. She crouched down and picked up a handful of gold coins and studied them in her hands, why would they want all this? Was there a troll town or village, much like the Shire, or were they greedy and kept it for themselves?

Bo dropped the coins and brushed off the dirt from her hands while standing up. She looked around and rolled her eyes seeing Gloin, Bofur and Nori filling up caskets full of coins. She turned a blind eye to it and walked back to Gandalf.

"I have never used a sword in my life." Bilbo stated, as Gandalf handed him a sword, it was small, perfectly sized for a hobbit. Gandalf must have found it in the cave.

"You have read it in one of your books right?" Bo asked. "I can teach you if you want, it considers all your strength and knowledge, knowledge you have but you need both in a fight."

Bo smiled before walking away, to let the two speak in private. Yet the happy atmosphere was quickly ruined as Thorin said something was coming! They all hurried out the cave which led out to the forest and ran for it. Quickly they all huddled together and their weapons were drawn, ready to fight yet again, still they didn't know where the sound was coming from. Get out from one danger to run into another one. It was truly going to be long quest, if they survive the dangers at all.


End file.
